Your Inner Beauty…Do You See It?

Do you see yourself through the lens of reality? You might think you are too fat, too old, too grey, too poor, too lonely; the list can go on infinitely. But why don’t you see yourself as beautiful inside and out?

I don’t mean to stand on a soapbox and preach, but this is a critical issue for so many of us. Women are battling depression at epic levels. Why don’t we think we are special, beautiful, and smart?

I write this as a video is circulating on LinkedIn for an ad campaign by Dove soap called You are so Beautiful.

The song is playing, and we watch a beautiful young child who grows up to develop an eating disorder because of the impact of social media. She gets treatment and then returns to good health in the end. It is a very touching video that really made me tear up. How many of us are out there not loving who we are? Perhaps, we think other people are better than we are. They are more successful, have killer abs, and seem to be luckier than any of us. This danger of comparing ourselves to others is a tragic mistake.

My cousin had an eating disorder that almost ended her life. She was a competitive ice skater and somehow felt the only thing she could control was food. Watching her battle from being in good health to being hospitalized and force fed was humbling. She eventually overcame her eating disorder and has lived a wonderful life since. I couldn’t understand why this happened. She had everything—beauty, popularity, straight A student, and was winning skating competitions. Her goal was to get to the Olympics. Outwardly she was exceeding her dreams and goals, but it didn’t make a difference with her internal battles.

That was back before the internet and the perils of social media. Unfortunately, popularity doesn’t insulate you from mental health issues. What looks perfect on the outside or in a Facebook post, isn’t necessarily what is going on in someone’s life. The lesson to learn is to not presume anything.

As a society, we have developed more problems with obesity and eating disorders through the years. We eat to deal with grief, stress, celebrations, and out of boredom. Our waistlines have grown exponentially as our technological capabilities have also grown. This is alarming.

Girls are tearing themselves down not feeling popular enough or successful enough. People are known for embellishing their lives on social media. Correction, some downright lie about their wonderful, dreamy existence. I have a friend who is an influencer. On Facebook she is driving fantastic cars, wearing spectacular clothes, going to openings in long dresses at least 3x a month. It is nonstop photos and videos to promote products. The truth is she needs a steady income. She is struggling to pay bills. What I am seeing on her social media is all fake. Yes, she goes to cool events and has a wardrobe that she sells each year when money is low, but steady income to live a normal life isn’t happening. Don’t get me wrong, I flip through her pictures to see what she is wearing, where she is traveling, resorts, galas, and which celebrities she is photographed with. But, when I heard her financial woes, it was sobering.

Girls are being altered because of this fake world. We used to think Hollywood was full of fake people. Now it is Facebook, Instagram, and every other app that I can’t keep up with.

So why rant like this? The Dove video hit home for me. Making women aware that you are perfect the way you are is important. So often, we are tearing people down instead of building them up. We must stop doing this for the next generation. When we gossip or are critical of others, it takes away from our own sense of wellness.

It doesn’t matter what someone else looks like or has in their life. The adage of treating people the way you want to be treated is so true. The last thing I want is for you to tear me down and destroy my self-esteem. So, I don’t allow it. I walk away from negativity or things that will make me feel inferior. I am a strong, middle-aged woman, who loves being who I am. Yeah, I have wrinkles, yeah, I would like to lose a couple of pounds. But yeah, I am a good person and am very happy with the world I have made for myself. The real question is…are you?

Please share your thoughts with me at diana2@discussdirectives.com.